Writers, Protect your Time

As a writer and a stay-at-home mom, one of my biggest challenges has been finding the uninterrupted time to actually sit and write, without needing to worry about outside or additional responsibilities.

That the unpaid duties of parenting and home keeping - whether beloved or merely tolerated - still fall primarily on the shoulders of mother, is an almost universal constant. Women have been navigating these competing priorities for generations now. Those of us working in the arts are not exceptions, although we might have the advantage of a short commute if our studio is at home, as mine is. A recent study of salary data, found that the work of a SAHM is worth over $162K per year, when all the different functional roles are added up. Today as housekeeper, cook and part-time administrative assistant, my salary should be about $90K - but that would assume I'm a bit more enthusiastic of a housekeeper than I usually manage. 

For the last 20 years, I have been acting as the support system for my partner (my husband) and his professional activity as the breadwinner, while my own career aspirations have fit in part-time, around the choices I made. Yes, I did make the choice to live this lifestyle, centering home schooling as my priority and all the multitude of tasks involved in being a home maker as how I spent my time. It wasn't my original ambition to be out of the workforce. I had planned a fabulous career in theater and film. Just because I am happy with the choice I made, and the beautiful life I lead, doesn't mean I don't sometimes mourn what might have been.

Slowly, starting about 10 years ago, my daughter grew ever more independent. As she needed less of my focus, and I turned increasingly towards working for an income. Now I am a writer, with my first book on its way to publication. (More on that soon.)

In fact, I would go further to say that now I am practically a full-time writer.

It is because my daughter has entered college, and my husband and she leave for work/school together early just about every morning. My productivity, now that I am free of interruptions or plaintive importunities for attention or snacks, has skyrocketed.

Never have I felt the truth of and identification with Virginia Woolf's idea in her essay, "A Room of One's Own" so keenly as now, when I feel the real difference the comes from being alone in the house for a specified, predictable and regular time on a repeating schedule.

How did I manage to write a whole biography before? Well, my daughter was able to give me just enough time alone at my desk each working day, either from her sleep schedule or from as much self-discipline as she could muster, that I was able to put in about three or four hours a day, with some extra magical times when I was able to squeeze in 8 or 9. But it was a slog, and there is no denying that sometimes the others in my household, while expressing full support, left me feeling torn with their reasonable neediness.

Image by OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay

Here are the tactics that I use, that worked well in the past to let me get some writing work done, and continue to work well now.

• While working on the bio, I had a daily set time when I wrote that I made sure everyone knew about. I had my accountability buddy to help me start every day at a consistent time. But I also had a set finishing time most days. When I was in a particular deadline mode, I would put the time on a dry erase sign, to let my people know when I was going to stop. I don't have an office with a door - yet - so that sign was very important. This included working on resumes too. 

• I got efficient about preparing meals, and I have only become more efficient now with week-long meal planning and a daily preparation time built in to my schedule. I know when they will be home, and I work to that each day. 

• I've been using a Pomodoro timer app. I let it tick aloud during the five minute breaks, when I jump up and do some quick housework task. But I find the countdown clock inspiring too. I have really become a lot more productive. 

• I have a to do list, numbered by priority. If I have to make fewer decisions, work gets done faster. I spent some time during the first week of January creating an editorial calendar for the first Quarter of the year, even longer for some aspects of my writing businesses. Just four pre-planned blog posts a quarter here - surely I can manage that. 

• I get most of my groceries delivered, especially the kind of household paper goods and sparkling water that come in bulk sizes. On the other hand, it can be a nice break to go up to the store and gather a week's worth of veges and proteins for meal planning. But the fast ordering and ability to avoid traffic and standing in lines, helps my time management immeasurably. 

There was no way for me to work consistently and in the great chunks that actually move a work of fiction along while my daughter was tiny and underfoot. Sure, I could knock out a blog post, or an article - even if it took a few sessions. But the ability to write a thousand reasonable words of a narrative or a screenplay needs the kind of time that allows flow - immersion in a whole other world where time moves entirely differently, and re-entering the common world, leaves one in a daze wondering where that time went...when did it get dark? How long has the cat been asserting her desire for her dinner? That takes protected time. And now I have it, for the time being at least.

Still Unpacking.

See my pear tree outside the window?

  Well here we are in our new home. It's fantastic. All we keep saying to one another is how excited we are.

We have been sleeping here for a little over a week, and I still have tons of boxes to unpack and organize. We have brought all the things we wanted from our apartment, as well as emptied our storage unit.

Immediately we asked ourselves why on earth we spent money storing some of these old fashioned (but not old enough to be cool) things for so many years. We have sent much of the furniture to be sold in our upcoming estate sale. Sadly our wool rug was infested and utterly destroyed. Into the trash it went.

But the beautiful leather furniture (above) from James' dad is looking wonderful, especially as I re-condition each piece. Will it fit? Maybe. Maybe I will get the tree lit this week. Maybe I will finish painting my old bookshelves white.

I have mentioned in the past that I don't like drills or wasted motion. So I'm working slowly to put things, especially in the kitchen, where they should live. My greatest desire right now is for an organized, efficient, ergonomic kitchen. And a pantry. My pantry cupboard is still only half assembled. But it's going to be awesome.

Eventually.

Concerning planned obsolescence and coffee making

My Keurig has been buggy for quite a while. It did work perfectly for at least 18 months, but then started getting increasingly temperamental. At first this manifested as constant requests to "De-Scale Now", regardless of how recently and thoroughly I had done so - following the manufacturer's recommendations, and even buying special stuff. Then however the internal computer that measures cup size went whacky. The machine would either pour about half a cup of coffee into the mug, regardless of the size chosen, or continue a stream of increasingly diluted coffee to fill two mugs and then some - or as tended to happen until I got wise, fill the drip tray and overflow to the counter.

My usual set up with jug.

It has now gotten to the point where I leave a jug under the spout, because it may decide to release some hot water at unpredictable intervals. I have quite a method for getting my coffee. I select either size (doesn't matter any more). The machine draws in some water and stops. If I wait a few gurgly drops may fall, and water pools on top of the pod - so grinds drip out if I lift the handle. So what I generally do is press the power button, wait a few seconds, switch it back on and wait for the Select Size cups to flash again momentarily. Then I press the size again (often only the larger size is available) and the machine draws in more water and starts to brew and pour.

As soon as my cup is full, I exchange it for a jug or other cup, and let it continue to pour, for what seems to be a random time. My sister-in-law experienced a similar problem after some time with her Keurig.

My experience with electronic gadgets and appliances in the past has been that taking them apart and giving them a bit of a clean, making sure all the connections are tight and uncorroded, often does wonders for making them come back to life. I'm fed up with the darn Keurig, so I decided to have a look inside and see if there was any scale build up that I could clean out manually.

After unplugging, of course, I turned the thing upside down and started unscrewing, pleased to see standard sized phillips head screws. This boded well. I took the bottom plate off, and was able to go one more "layer" of screws into the machine, before I came to a realization.

Keurigs are designed to be replaced, not repaired. Evident planned obsolescence. I have read that the company does not repair the machines.

It's not that repairing it would be impossible, just really time consuming and fussy for the technician, and therefore expensive for the consumer - most likely more expensive than a new unit. Nothing is plugged in, everything is soldered. It's not at all modular inside. Some of the screws are nearly impossible to get to without disconnecting every other part - and the wires pretty much have to be cut just to get parts out of the housing. Some screws are so inaccessible I didn't even know they were there until a piece of plastic cracked off in one corner. The water hose is enclosed inside parts or insulation in more than one place, to make it almost impossible to replace in the event of damage. To be fair, the likelihood of damage to the hose inside the machine is vanishingly small.

I can see the sense in making an internally complex machine, to deter industrial competition. The innards are a cautious meeting of water and electronic components, and of course the computerized part and LCD. It is certainly very solid - lots of steel plates. I'm sure there are many safety aspects of how it is put together. But to go further in my exploration I would need special screw drivers, and considerably more motivation. It's not deconstruction. It's demolition. And that is why the reconstruction would be a pain.

Upcycled K-Cup light shades on my holiday garland.

I may bite the bullet and break it down to components, once I have determined on a new course for my morning coffee. I have a bulk box of pods to finish. At the end of that, I may return to the old drip filter way - and my small 4-cup drip machine languishing in the back of the newly organized cupboards behind the stand mixer has a permanent, reusable mesh filter so I don't even need to buy paper coffee filters. They - machine and filter - have lasted for years and years. I also own a very nice single serve french press travel mug. That's the simplest thing of all.

It's been fun, having a single serve instant use coffee maker - or at least it was until fiddling became more prevalent than convenience. Part of the attraction of Keurigs and similar machines, is the idea of a wide variety of flavors and drinks. I do have some nice tea, hot chocolate and apple cider pods. But for actual coffee, I have a strong preference for Fair Trade, so that has limited my flavor choices essentially to one, which negates the main advantage of Keurig.

The more I write, the more I'm talking myself out of getting a new Keurig. I haven't made a cup since I put it back together. Let's hope everything sealed back up properly at the water intake point. I don't like fuss. I don't like having to fuss. I just want things to work. Simple things work simply, don't they?

Any thoughts on coffee makers? Please comment!

The clean up continues.

Crafting and sewing storage

I don't know if anyone has noticed, but I've been pretty darn quiet on all my blogs over the last couple of weeks. I've done no writing, no crafting, no scrapbooking, no doll making, no art. Basically I've been so focused on the declutter that other things have been put on hold. However, Jayn's small birthday party went well, and the girls learnt how to play charades. I heard a lot of laughing from the other room.

Latest Donations - lots going to the nursery school my neighbors kids attend - rest to Goodwill.

My big clean has been wonderful. We took another load to the Goodwill yesterday, and yet another load to storage. James said that it looked like our storage unit was getting full, but I replied, "You can still see the ceiling".

The empty, tidy hallway.

It's funny how small things can give so much pleasure. I put my vacuum cleaner away inside the hallway closet, and it felt wonderful. So now it is just the bedroom, the bathroom, and one small corner of the office. I'm not doing that today though. I have a Halloween costume to finish.

Meanwhile I'm at home hoping the phone does not ring. Because my new doctor has a "no news is good news after a week" policy. There are ultrasounds and mammograms and other lab tests to wait for - mostly just routine stuff. Get your mammograms ladies. It doesn't hurt anywhere near as much as purported by humor. The worst part is that it might pinch your skin just a bit. It's not even pain, but just a little bit of momentary discomfort, and pressure that is probably less than from your too small underwire bra at the end of a long day. And a mammogram is not a long day. Just a half a minute per image.

Felt like the end of an era.

Here's the wood replaced. Hope it works.

Our shower repair has expanded into a longer job than predicted - of course. Now it will not be finished before the middle of next week - which will be a two week job. It is running concurrently with a similar job, though with less water damage,  in the apartment next door.

Concrete pour #1. 

To add annoyance, the hose in my kitchen sink which has been invaluable for hair washing, is busted - both the nozzle and a tear in the plastic hose itself. Changing it is too big a job for DIY - something odd and non-standard in the attachment. Sigh. Will I never get to color my hair?

Meanwhile my de-clutter continues. Yesterday we took the first six good sized boxes of Jayn's dolls to our storage unit, freeing up the same amount of space on the shelves here (to be allocated to James). It was strange carefully wrapping and packing these dolls, many of which were rarely played with. No twinges  at least from her - about these particular dolls leaving the house. Seems like she will never be a little girl again.

How cute is my honey?

But Jayn has big plans for them all - her doll museum and play center. It's actually nice to think that I am contributing to her future by placing these in storage, so that when the time comes, they will be ready. Either that or they will be largely forgotten until some magical moment in the hazy future when she opens them up and finds "vintage" dolls of great value - for her own kids, or future collectors.

Working on our shower

 Some time ago our downstairs neighbor noticed moisture and mildew coming from above his shower, that is to say our shower recess. At the time a cracked tile in our shower recess was blamed, eventually replaced, and a very bad job done of re-grouting our shower.

Over time it has proved nearly impossible to keep mold and mildew from swiftly growing into the grout and silicon seal in our shower, exacerbated by the lack of sunlight into the shower recess itself (although the bathroom is lovely and light, especially in the afternoons from the west facing window). Seven months ago I noticed that grout had completely cracked away in some places, and alerted the management to the extreme probability that the same problem would recur.

About one month ago, someone finally came to inspect the issue, and decided that I needed new tile work and a new shower pan, so the workers have come today at last. As it turns out several other apartments in the complex also have leaks below their showers.

However once the tiles have been lifted and the cement broken up with a jack hammer, they found that all the wood has rotted and also needs replacing. I am  not surprised - the water had to go somewhere, and this has been years and years. I suppose we can count ourselves lucky that we haven't fallen through the floor! James tells me that this actually happened in a house he lived in as a young person.

The smell of mold is very strong. I'm glad the guys have masks in there.

Meanwhile I have been given some extra impetus to focus on my household clean up by the landlord. Forward. As of today, another cupboard emptied, more defunct gadgets boxed for the recycler, and the kitchen is still immaculate. (I even put the mixer away immediately after using it last night.)

Tidying the Craft Supplies

My declutter is moving very slowly, what with travels and doll commissions and rewrites of scripts. However I am at a point where I have an urgent need to reorganize my art and craft supplies, take stock of what I have and create the space for the next round of Craft-It-Easy project designs.

I've grabbed two large cardboard boxes. and just cleared the two tables of all the projects in progress and other stuff that had accumulated directly into the boxes - instant space. Then I started allocating all the supplies to small clear boxes I had purchased for the purpose. They all have lids, so they'll stack and fill the space on the shelves more efficiently than my current overflowing open topped system. I've got the labels temporarily taped to the fronts, so that if I find I need to redistribute I can. I'm surprised to learn how many rubber stamps I have, and how few decorative punches. The other great plus - I found my brayer! I've been searching for it.

In other news, Jayn is going to Wide Sky Days without James or I. She will be staying with our friend Erika, and I expect that she will have a wonderful time. She is all packed and ready. I will be driving her down in the morning, after a trip to the market to stock up on easily prepared snacks. It is true that all things have their season - and this is a season of separation and maturity. It is further proof that there is no need to force or push independence on our children. The growth to autonomy comes at the right time, and sometimes with a great big leap.

Shifting habit

Neat and accessible

Slowly, I am moving forward. I have now cleared one armoire, which is being set up as a battery and appliance charging station, and mailing center. I have two boxes of old electronics to go to the recycler, and the top is pretty much cleared so that I now have space to display the miniature dioramas Jayn and I made a couple of years ago.

The black bookshelf next to the kitchen now stands almost empty, waiting for other scattered office supplies to migrate (neatly). A large collection of unused (some even brand new) cookbooks have been donated, leaving the few that I do refer to often, much easier to grasp. With my discards, goes much of my guilt about not using them. May they bless the folks that find them!


I found forgotten stuff too. I have contributor copies of book that will be for sale at NEUC (along with dolls). 

The best news of all  is that I have been assiduous in keeping up the kitchen, and the result is that I'm feeling an emotional change already. I think it's a "habit shifting". When I see a plate on the counter, I feel a tiny bit of stress that prompts me to wash it at once, then I feel serene again. Yay! This is the opposite of clutter blindness. I hope it spreads.

Any one else working on similar issues?

The Path to an Uncluttered Mind

Counter space!

As some of you make know if you are a Facebook friend, I have finally embarked on a serious declutter and reorganization program. I realized that my home was overwhelming my ability to create, write, or even make a reasonable stab at meals (and you know how I despise  cope with cooking at the best of times.)

I also started thinking that if we soon have the ability to move to a better place, as we all hope for, the actual packing up process will be truly horrendous. So my plan is to create mental and emotional readiness, my message to the Universe, by clearing the junk away that I certainly don't want in my next home, now.

My kitchen looks awesome - the appliances are actually out of sight, and I got rid of those tablecloths I don't like. My mailing center and office armoire is wonderful, and now the rest of the office area/dining room will follow suit over the next few days. I wrote a comprehensive, task based list, for every room, with timings attached, so that I work in three hour blocks. I included the key task - "Take out trash - 5 mins" at regular intervals, so that the discard pile does not become an issue in itself.

Now I can find things at once without having to dodge an avalanche.

Part of my declutter is mental, including freeing myself from "obligations" that are entirely imaginary. Here's a big example. For years I would send out 72 (yup) Christmas/Holiday cards to family, friends, and work colleagues of both my husband and I. This meant that I made by hand, 72 pretty cards. Bear in mind, most of my work colleagues are from 12+ years ago!

When I started thinking about reducing my list last year, I agonized. Certainly I received back way fewer than I sent out. But what if the world ended if that guy felt bad when he didn't get a fabulous hand made card from us this year? Wait, how do we know that guy?

Then I started thinking of it a different way. What if I relieved someone, or someone's administrative assistant, from the onerous obligation of having to send out a return card to someone they really didn't remember either?

Even better, what if I could use that saved time to make better, truly beautiful cards for the people I really do care about? Win, win.

I received a total of 19 cards last year, all from people we actually know and really do care about. I find I hold no resentment whatsoever against the people who did not send us cards. Perhaps they feel the same way. I feel so much freer!

Of course the 19 are still hanging on display, but that will end soon, and they will turn into tree decorations per this tutorial. Yay.

What completely self-inflicted "obligations" have you been holding on to, that are cluttering up your mind or spirit? Please comment.